Cherry Blossom Diaries: Kazushi's Obsession

Dear CBD,

I love your publication, Ms. Douzan. Please publish my letter! I know most of the submissions to your magazine come from women... That is why I love it so... Everything you publish is so vividly described! I don't believe a word of what they write, all of this superstitious, supernatural garbage... But there's always a sexual component to it every time. You women... You make people like me out to be sick, disgusting perverts. But what are you? You're no more innocent than I. You walk around with your bodies half exposed, yet you mock men when we look! Which is it, Ms. Douzan?! I bet you're just as bad, another disgusting weed parading yourself as a gentle flower!

But... She wasn't one of you... What have I done? My lust, my obsession with her beauty and her innocence, everything about her... It overcame me.

I won't tell some bitch in the media like yourself her lovely name. I won't let you make money or get famous with my story! I'm just some poor fisherman's son and she was a woman of standing. I walked by her home on the way to the docks for years. Not some westernized piece of shit, very traditional, old Japanese styling. It was almost castle-like. I saw her for the first time when I was 14. I didn't think much of her at first glance, just some girl in a kimono.

It was summer and I'd been working with my father for shit pay. I'd seen her with her mother buying fish while unloading our own catch. Like I said, I didn't think much of it at the time. The only thought I did have is as to why such gentle looking women were willingly surrounding themselves with smelly fisherman.

That night, lying in bed, she popped into my mind. In an instant, I wanted her. Her done up black hair, decorated with flowers, that soft blue kimono and purple sash, her adorable face. What was she like? I didn't learn that it was she who lived in the castle until later, so I wondered where she lived, what were her favorite things? How great would it be to fuck someone so beautiful?

My dad was divorced, another "pervert" as you bitches would say. He drove my mother away by fucking around on her with teenagers. Despite this, he didn't like me being into women at my age. All throughout my teen years he would talk shit to me every time he found a picture or if I made a comment. "They just want your money! You don't even make any!" The internet was my refuge.

I could say whatever I wanted to them, look at them doing everything imaginable. Then my thoughts shifted to her doing these things I was seeing. I'd seen her a few times more after the first time, once becoming so entranced that another of our boat crew kicked me in the ass and made me fall in the water. I started following her every chance I got. We don't have a lot in our town, but I loved watching her do anything. Then I started following her home to her castle. At first I just watched her disappear up the long road, but then I started becoming more brazen. A little more each time, then I started ending up on the grounds of the home. Danger is a tempting mistress, I was getting thrills I didn't know could be felt. What could I do? I was addicted.

I'd noticed a man-made hot spring on the property on one of my first visits there. The thought of her bathing, seeing a fantasy come to life was too enticing. It took forever for it to happen, I'd been going there with this purpose alone for nearly a month, but nothing. I almost threw it away in frustration by yelling "Just come out and do it!!" one evening. Luckily I was not heard.

I saw her eventually. Hidden in a bush not far from the spring, it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. She was perfect in every way, a real girl in the bare flesh! Not some photoshopped slut on the internet. I couldn't contain myself watching this, I masturbated twice while watching her. But now that I'd accomplished this, what else was left but to feel her soft, silken skin?

An 18 year old virgin with no friends, stuck in some stupid old fishing town. We'd run away. Yes. Make a break for Tokyo and I could work for a real fishing company and give her a nice life. She must have something she needs to escape from, some inner turmoil or family issue. Who would want to stay here even if she didn't? She would understand.

That brings me to now, Ms. Douzan. I broke into her house tonight, her family was away. I startled her, Ms. Douzan. She screamed and tried to run away. When I caught her, she looked at me and said "YOU!" How did she know? Apparently this fairytale castle is equipped with security cameras... She called me a stalker, a fucking pervert, told me I made her skin crawl and said that I'd better kill her if I attacked her, otherwise she'd kill me. I tried telling her that I didn't want to hurt her, that I loved her! She came at me and it all ended so quickly, Ms. Douzan...

I just dodged her charge, my hands grazed her back, but that was all! She fell over a banister and landed head first. The sound was disgusting. I didn't murder her in the traditional sense, but I know what I've done... I took my prize, I don't fucking care what you or anyone think of that. I'm fucking dead anyway, I have been since she perished. The dead can't "rape" the dead. Where am I now? Watching television with my new family. My beautiful wife and mom and dad in law. Dad's got a closeup view of the TV, his head just sits there all day. Mom likes me too, she cheated on dad. You fucking whores...

Good day, Ms. Douzan. I bought a huge stack of your magazines online. The wife and I are avid bedtime readers.

Kazushi